So You Want To Break Up

I can’t believe that I have been writing for so long and haven’t realized that I haven’t hit on this topic. It’s safe to say that every relationship results in marriage or breaking up. Regardless, it may come to the point where you don’t believe that the two of you should be together and therefore need to call it quits. I’ve been there before and believe me – it’s not the best feeling in the world.

Look to the Bible - One of the first things to remember when calling it off is Luke 6:31: “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” If your idea of breaking up involves anything that you don’t think the other person would appreciate, don’t do it! If you think that it’s time to call it quits, think before you act. It’s always a great idea to know what you’re going to say instead of “winging it.”

Seek advice of others - You should have other couples and mature Christians to talk to throughout your relationship, and this is a great time to get their advice. Do they think that it’s time to call it off or do they think that you should tweak some things and keep going? While they may not know all the information about your relationship, chances are they have a pretty good idea solely through observation.

No need for a laundry list - Don’t bust out with a long list of reasons why you are breaking up. Chances are your boyfriend/girlfriend will also feel like the two of you need to break up and therefore it’s not necessary to point out all of their faults. When sharing that you believe the two of you need to break up, simply tell them that you’ve thought about it, prayed about it, and came believe that the relationship should not continue (of course this isn’t the only thing that you should tell them – just be honest!)

If you definitely know that it’s not going to work, don’t drag it out - This is a big one. If you were dating someone and thought you were going to get married but your partner has different ideas, wouldn’t you want them to tell you instead of having that hope for weeks, months or even years? Don’t stay together just to say that you have a boyfriend/girlfriend. That is one of the worst reasons to be in a relationship since eventually it will end in breaking up (even if you don’t want to admit it).

Don’t expect them to be totally fine - Of course they are going to feel hurt! Give them time to process what just happened and then follow up with them at a later time to see if you can help.

Try your best to still be friends even after the relationship is over - You’ll both be thankful that you are still friends after a relationship. I’m not going to lie – it’s going to be pretty awkward for awhile. But once you both realize that ending your relationship was for the best, you’ll still value your friendship.

I’ll be sure to post about if you are on the receiving end of breaking up. Sadly, I have been on that side of the fence as well and will share some tips on how to handle it.

God Bless!